This
week I have found my faith in humanity restored a little. Not that
I'm ever the complete curmudgeon. I tend to be the optimist and
believe the best of people. I usually believe that most people, when
it comes right down to it, genuinely care about other, their friends,
family and community if not the rest of the world. But, there are
times when watching the news or reading news reports about the
horrible things that take place every day that it is difficult to
maintain that positive attitude. The recent political climate and the
mean-spirited discourse that defined it hasn't helped. This post
isn't about that at all, so I don't want this to become a political
rant. My leanings are pretty obvious to anyone who knows me. But
there was a polarization and overall nasty tone to the whole that
neither side is innocent of. I'm also kind of appalled by the general
level of snark that infuses much of what I see in people's personal
posts, on Facebook or message boards or comments sections or
whatever. The continual complaining gets tiresome when we live in a
world that our ancestors from not very long ago would consider
miraculous and filled with magic.
Anyway,
the first part of this story is part of the ugly side of things, and
there are no words to describe how sorry I am that this occurred.
Last
weekend an acquaintance of mine, Dave Whaley, was assaulted on the
Southside of Pittsburgh. I say acquaintance because while I've known
Dave for years I can't say I know him well. He works at a music store
I have frequented for a long time. He is a local musician I have seen
play over the years in various bands. He is very close friends with
people I am very close friends with. He is a fixture in the larger
Pittsburgh community I consider myself to be a part of. Dave is one
of the quietest and nicest people you will ever meet.
I
saw him last Saturday night. I was out with a group of friends at a
restaurant/bar. The place featured Karaoke, and while that's not why
we chose this place we had a lot of fun. Dave wasn't part of our
group, but he had stopped by our table to say “Hi.” While we were
putting on our coats and getting ready to leave someone was
performing Fairies Wear Boots by Black Sabbath and I was
amused to see that Dave and I were the only people in the audience
who were singing along (quietly and to ourselves, of course).
About
a half an hour later Dave was assaulted on his walk home.
From
what I gather a car flew through a red light and came very close to
hitting him. Dave yelled for the driver to slow down. I have a tough
time imagining Dave even yelling at someone, so I doubt it was much
more heated than that. The driver stopped, got out and cold cocked
Dave in the face, knocking him unconscious and breaking his orbital
bone in a couple of places.
You
can read the news story HERE.
There
is not a very good description of the assailant, so unfortunately it
seems the chances of catching him are remote.
Dave
was hospitalized and had surgery on Tuesday. He's home now and by all
accounts is doing well. As a musician and someone who works at a
small independently owned business he does not have insurance. In
addition to the pain and physical and emotional trauma this experience
could lead to financial ruin. One punch by a drunken, rage-filled
moron could destroy a man's life.
And
here's where my faith comes back...
The
outpouring of support from Dave's friends and the wider community has
been phenomenal. A Dave Whaley Support page was set up on Facebook.
There is a website called Youcaring.com that's like a Kickstarter for
healthcare. In a little over 24 hours the site had collected $8000 to help pay Dave's medical expenses (and as of this posting
there is still time to donate... go to Dave's page at http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/Dave-Whaley-Medical-Fund/26029). This money
is all from private donations from people who care about Dave.
But
that's not all. There are at least five local events planned as
fundraisers. Local bands donating their time to help one of their
own. I heard there was a tattoo/piercing shop that would donate the
entire cost of a piercing if the customer mentioned Dave. A
restaurant gave 15% of your bill to the fund if you mentioned Dave.
T-shirts supporting him are being sold and the printing
cost of them was donated.
Many Southside bars, restaurants and other establishments have banded together to raise awareness of violence and crime in their neighborhood in response to this incident because they realize this effects them all. Dave is going to need ongoing post-surgery vision rehabilitation, and someone found a specialist willing to donate the service for free, sort of a medical version of pro bono work.
Many Southside bars, restaurants and other establishments have banded together to raise awareness of violence and crime in their neighborhood in response to this incident because they realize this effects them all. Dave is going to need ongoing post-surgery vision rehabilitation, and someone found a specialist willing to donate the service for free, sort of a medical version of pro bono work.
While
I am pained that this incident had to happen I am so proud of my
community, my friends and my city. This is what it means to take care
of each other. When it's someone you know and care about it's easy to
justify helping to pay for their healthcare. It's easy to see how a
single moment in someone's life can destroy them financially. It's a real person with real value and not an anonymous statistic. This is
not about politics, it's about being decent human beings. It's about
recognizing this could happen to anyone and any of us could find
ourselves in a similar situation in a heartbeat. One minute you're
singing a Black Sabbath tune and the next you're unconscious on the
sidewalk.
Why
can't we be this caring and supportive of everyone?
Other
than Dave there were two kinds of people involved in this incident.
One was a rage-fueled asshole who didn't care about anything other
than his own hurt feelings and self-importance. The other kind is the
multitude of people who showed they genuinely care about the
well-being of another human being. We need to extrapolate this
personal connection to a specific person to the world at large.
Who
do you want to be... A rage-filled asshole or someone who understands
we're all in this together?
